"Clean up the mess and sleep the day away"

So, first off let me start off with a quick critique of JUNO.

I loved it and I really didn't think I was going to. I really believe the acting saved the movie though. The writing was only so-so.

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I often see couples together and it makes me feel juvenile. Like I'm not mature enough to be in an adult relationship. The one thing about the movie is that it deals with teens having sex and what not. And it really makes me thankful that I was always smart enough to never put myself in any situation like that. The awkward, difficult teenage sex however often prepares people for not so awkward and difficult adult sex. And that is something that I have missed out on. NOW I have to deal with a situation that I am really not looking forward to.

I had a really strange thought today. I have been sitting around waiting for my life to begin and if I were to be in some horrible accident I would never be able to achieve any of the things I intend on achieving. The idea that nothing is guaranteed scares the crap out of me. The list of things I want to do in my life is endless. And I'm still trying to deal with the situation of whether or not I should take a year off from school. I have no doubt in my mind that I will go back once my year is up. But the fact that I'll be setting myself back a year is highly discomforting. I'm still not sure what I should do. Each day its different and I really hate that about myself. I am the most indecisive person known to mankind. I could never be a political leader, the country would never progress lol. I don't want to rule my own country fortunately, I don't have to worry about missing out on any of that. I'd love to think that life is limitless and I'm sure, in a way, it is. but I have yet to achieve that peace of mind. So for the time being I'll stick with the paranoia of dying at any given moment.